I've never liked limitations. Diets, budgets, schedules. I despise them all. For some reason I think I should be able to do it all: eat what I want and be thin, spend what I want and have money in savings, do what I want and have time and energy to spare. Unfortunately, life doesn't work that way.
Barbara Curtis said something at Mount Hermon that
has stuck to me like poison oak, making me uncomfortable until I do something
about it. She said, “As a writer, your life will not look like the life of
other mommies who do not share your call.”
That’s true I thought, in addition to all the things
my "normal" mommy friends do, I write, edit, lead a writers group, attend conferences,
submit articles and book proposals, receive rejections and encouragement and
spend a lot of time improving my craft. I write blogs, read constantly,
critique other writer’s work and learn everything I can about the Christian publishing
industry. Wow! No wonder I sometimes feel overwhelmed.
What I think Barbara was telling me was that if I am
going to take my call to write seriously, I must do all of the above instead of some of the things my mommy
friends do.
If I am going to be a fully-engaged mommy and
fulfill my call to write, I have to take some things out of my life. That’s the
part that itches and then hurts when I scratch it.
I’ve been wrestling with what to take out of my
life.
Maybe I could cut out some of my daily chores. Did
you know it takes about 24 hours a year to make my bed every morning? It’s
true, I did the math. That’s a whole day! Just think of the time I could save
by not making dinner and not doing laundry? Wouldn’t that be something? Right.
That'll never work.
So, I have to look elsewhere for things to cut. And
I’ve started by saying “no” to all new opportunities that do not directly
benefit my marriage, family or writing. That’s right, “no” to watching TV--unless I’m ironing or cooking. “No” to going out to lunch with girlfriends. “No” to selling
hot dogs at my son’s baseball games.
Don’t worry, I’m not going to go overboard and live like a monk. I will still get the occasional pedicure and celebrate birthdays with friends. I’m not going to be legalistic about it, I’m just adjusting to make more room in my life for my writing. Without taking time away from my Jesus, my husband and my children. I’m learning to live within my limitations of time and energy. How about you?
Gratefully,
Beth
I will read this particular blog a hundred times this weekend as I ponder what it is I need to put limits on! Excellent food for thought (and well written!) I want to excel in the craft of writing -- I know God called me to it -- but what time-drains am I allowing to get in the way? Wow -- I'm already pondering! Thanks!
Posted by: Barbara Oden | April 24, 2009 at 03:17 PM
Beth, you speak to so many of us. It would be easier if all we had to do was cut out the meaningless, wouldn't it? You lay out the choices clearly, and your priorities are right on. You give us a measuring stick. Thanks!
Posted by: Lenore Buth | May 08, 2009 at 08:45 PM
Beth, these are good words to remember. I have found some of my friends don't quite get my calling to write; they either make it a bigger deal than it is, or dismiss it as un-definable on their terms.
Hope to see some new posts for 2010! Unless of course, blogging is now a part of the 'no' because you are working on a book!
Posted by: wendy | April 06, 2010 at 10:03 AM